My Everchanging Plot of Life

Just to say, won't be around for a while...

All quests and glaring contests are only on hold for a few days.

I'm off on a treasure hunt with a parrot, a tortoise and a hare, think I've got all the clues sorted and the map, shoes need a little attention.

Here's hoping I don't get lost and return home safely.

And not too wet.

See you all soon!!

Goodness - I'd forgotten how much doing accounts could cause me brain ache!!

However, the temporary crisis is over. With a little assistance, I've remembered how to do bank reconciliations, (I've got spoiled with an accounts package that does it for you!) and am sailing through it all now.

So, I may not be in for an all night work session after all, but I won't be going off early, either...

I wouldn’t have chosen doing something to my foot as a way of keeping me on task and at the computer, but it does seem to be working…. it’s much better, thank you, but I can still feel it giving the odd twinge. I do promise to take it to the doctor’s, along with the rest of me, next week!

Either that or the ominously close deadline is fuelling my still somewhat lacking motivation.

I’ve also set up my e-mail thingummy whatsit to check for e-mails at shorter, regular intervals, same with my RSS feeds, which has assisted in reducing the compulsive checking for e-mails/new posts to read every time the work with the spreadsheets gets really, really boring (every three minutes or so… the fun starts after lunch now I’ve finally done the really, really boring bits.)

Time for lunch, I’ve been here since 8.00 a.m.

There are things I thought I’d outgrown… don’t be cheeky, there are plenty of those… hiding under the bed in case I shrink back into them, mostly.

But along with migraines, dodgy haircuts, and dubious taste in many things, I thought going over on my ankle was something I left behind in my teens.

I had a notoriously dodgy ankle, and seemed to spend half my time with it bandaged up – to the point of the PE staff accusing me of faking it to get out of PE. They had a point, I had most of the excuses known to them, and a few I’d come up with all by myself. Arranging for clarinet lessons to coincide with PE in my O level year was a stroke of genius, as I could say, in all innocence, in perfect truth and – more to the point - with staff backing, missing my Music O level lessons, timetabled to be at the far edge of a large campus, when I was wanting to do Music A level was not the best plan.

However, yesterday, on exiting from a car, I did the most spectacular tumble over, landing myself neatly at the feet of a rather charming young man who assisted me in standing up.

I thought I was OK, but, after 16 or so hours, obviously not. I woke up with a sore foot in the middle of the night, and have spent most of today with it bandaged up and in the horizontal.

This is not the best bit of timing, so here’s hoping it’s better by Monday! Else I’ll be a Hop-a-long Pirate for the week.

We’re better organised for next week than any of the concerned parties thought.

The missing bank statement has turned up. I had been much maligned, and apologies have been forthcoming!!

Various other apologies and acknowledgements of stupidity have been forthcoming too… and recent incidents will not be mentioned again. This forgiveness caper is hard work, as is tolerance.

I can sleep for ages and ages tomorrow.

Hopefully, this strange limbo period of time will be over soon, and I can get to work on settling here properly.

Here I am, not having done anything that I intended, and indeed needed, to do today.

But – in the midst of having a Big Think, I have got an awful lot of housework done, and made some pirate’s shoes… (Just to put you out of your misery, it’s children’s holiday club every day next week – I’ve been working on getting the props together!!).

So, is the Big Think shareable?

I guess I’m an awful lot more unsettled by this move than I’ve been admitting and an awful lot more than fed up with day to day life. I really, really don’t want to believe the events of yesterday evening happened – because if it’s a taste of how things are going to be, I know I cannot live with it.

Hopefully, after I’ve been away for ten days, I’ll have a bit better perspective. I know I’ve been going way over board on doing practical things to distract me for weeks now … and I do need to work out what the way forwards in all this is.

One thing is sure, I will not be treated like an incompetent child, and have made that abundantly clear. If you really don’t like what I’m doing, at least have the guts to tell me so, rather than hiding a vital piece of equipment, so I won’t “misuse” it. Which then caused me to waste at least two hours looking for it, which included turning wheelie bins out…. only finding out some hours later, when I asked a casual question about whether or not I’d left it in a stupid place, that it had been hidden in a place I wouldn't think to look.

But I can’t be sure something like this won’t happen again.

I've found the teapot, lost the paint-brush, am ploughing my way through entering data on three different spreadsheets, and wondering why I'm huddled up in my cosy fleece, needing lights on mid-afternoon in what is supposed to be....

On second thoughts, please don't give into temptation and enlighten me, I know exactly why, and I'm just totally grateful I'm not in a flooded area, and don't have to go out in the pouring rain today.

I started trying to record, and made such a pig’s ear of it I’ve left it for another day… I could’ve been doing my degree final recitals I was so nervous, it’s only a simple tune, for goodness’ sake.

Now, just who’s got the tea-pot? I can’t finish painting my map and pieces of paper until it’s found… Well, it doesn’t get used for tea making in this house, it might as well serve some decent function!

The music stand, however, is doing very valiant service holding up the pieces of paper so I can copy type all the information into spreadsheets…

I’ve got the place to myself All Day… I’ve got loud music on, the washing up can stack up until I start cooking the evening meal.

Oh yes, it’s going to be another action-packed, completely confusing day around here.

I’m sitting glancing over, nervously, at the instruction manual and panicking!!!

I need to record a simple song into the memory of my keyboard, but it’s a scary prospect because I’ve never done this before. It's a foreign language!!

I’m a simple person, I’m best with one of your ordinary pianos, where I’m in control. (Well, I’m not too bad with organs, either. Or clarinets. But, I have a sneaky suspicion the piano just has the edge, it’s definitely the one I turn to most readily.)

These keyboards with 200+ sounds and rhythms and layers and volume control and buttons to press and so much to go wrong…..

I shall go and have some supper first, then be brave. I can always be so much braver when I’ve had something to eat.

OK, OK, I’ve been desperately trying not to admit what was in my parcel!

But – it hasn’t arrived, so I had resigned myself to waiting until Monday.

However, I wasn’t the only person in the world getting a similar parcel and I was lent a copy at 2.00 p.m. yesterday afternoon.

So, at 3.00 p.m. I ensconced myself in my room, with book, large pot of coffee, and large bar of chocolate until 7.45 p.m. when I emerged bleary eyed, but very, very satisfied (and more than a little taken aback, I hadn’t guessed some of it at all….)

I have also finished the map of the Mediterranean, and the paper aging process I’ve been working on with several other pieces of paper.

No, I won’t tell you what happened. But I can’t wait for my own copy to arrive so I can have a slow, thorough re-read, as I’m handing the borrowed copy back today!

I don't do early mornings.

But, today, here's me been up since before 6 a.m. and working hard for most of it..

I have currently ground to a temporary hold because I'm minus the one piece of equipment necessary to obliterate most of my freehand drawing of a map of the Mediterranean. It's in a box - somewhere.

It would appear I failed Geography "O" level with good cause. As well as it being clear as to why I decided Art was not my subject at a very early age!

None of this has anything to do with the fact I've just been out to check if the postman has been....

As to which of the following would have you all questioning my sanity most.

The fact I’ve just crept downstairs to put a note on the door for the postman so that he doesn’t, for tomorrow at least, put our post through the other door in the building – in this case, a note to say he’s taken my long awaited parcel back to the collecting place. And I will probably be up early to waylay him, anyway!!

The fact I will be spending all day tomorrow, arrival of parcel permitting, reading.

I have spent all this evening making pieces of paper look old and weathered. This involved making a pot of tea. Which completely astounded one of my telephone callers this evening, who is all too well aware of my opinion that tea is an invention of the devil. Until she realised what I was actually doing with it…

The above comment would always get the reply of “It’s not raining” in my dim and distant youth – a relatively effective way of preventing over-usage of the phrase.

I feel justified in uttering it today. It’s raining bucket loads and stair-rods and cats and dogs. I’ve come home from a wild shopping expedition all drookit!! Am in clean, dry clothes now!!

Anyway, we have a tortoise!!! We have purple cloth, and white cloth and black cloth, we have most things that were on the Biggest List I’ve written for a long time, apart from one item, which has caused several people behind their counters in photography shops to shake their heads, and mutter “We don’t sell that any more” and “Health and safety” at me.

So, I’ve come home for a nice quiet sit down, and a ponder of life and the universe and why anyone would want to be so rude and describe me as “short and not thin!” in a very public place.

As I write, the printer is having its first bit of activity for three weeks now!

Letters are being churned out.

The Biggest List I’ve written for a long time is also sitting in the print queue.

As is the note for the postman for Saturday.

The speakers, though, may have finally died. They are quite old…. um, 1997 vintage, and from New Zealand… This I have to admit is not much of a problem at all.

So, I’m down to eight boxes to unpack, receipts to put into an order that makes sense to someone else and a lot of drawing of maps and flags… Wahay!!

The laundry's done and the beds are made..

Really going now...

Bye

You have all been enjoying yourselves speculating what the parrot, the rabbit and the tortoise are all doing in my work.

Just off out to find a lunch box, purple cloth and chains now!!

See you later.

I’ve used every excuse I can think of, but no more. I have work to do and I really should be getting on with it properly.

I have lists to make, tortoises to acquire (toy variety) maps to draw, flags to make, PowerPoint words to get to the PowerPoint expert, paper to age… (must go and make a pot of tea soon, too)

There’s laundry to hang out, beds to make, vacuuming to be done…

I have receipts to sort out, a printer to connect to the computer.

There are ten boxes still to unpack. Some of which have the equipment I need to create things with.

I have to write some thank you letters.

What I shouldn’t be doing is luxuriating in the delights of broadband, (I've been deprived of internet access properly for ages now...is my only excuse, poor and feeble though it is) plotting how to get the postman to deliver my delayed birthday present parcel to the correct door on Saturday morning, (yes, I know my birthday was a few months ago now, I was given a Very Important IOU!), working out how to get from here to my godsons’ house, or how to ensure …

Come on, you’ve made most of the lists now – just do some work.

See you later………

Oh dearie me… this is a woeful day.

I can’t quite decide if I’m showing my age, losing my principled stand against such things, or just plain losing the plot. The latter, as you may have gathered, I do at quite regular intervals anyway.

But, I’ve just finished registering for my local supermarket’s loyalty card…

I’m going to take so much flak for this from various people – I’ve been against them in a very outspoken way for quite some time, but even I’ve had to admit the battle is lost.

Yes, that’s correct, keeping a parrot under control is hard work.

That’s a puppet parrot, by the way! I’ve been practicing this afternoon, in between dealing with a Quandary, and learning new bus routes!

She is a delightfully brightly coloured member of her species, but definitely has a mind and a voice of her own, and has me well under her control already. Goodness only knows what it’s going to be like when we’re let loose on the unsuspecting public together.

Now, the dilemma is, is she going to hide under my cloak, (There is ample room!) only to emerge at strategic moments, or do we find her a comfy basket/perch?

For me as well as the computer! To say nothing of Blogland…

I wandered downstairs to enquire about the intermittent nature of the internet connection (from being the most computer literate person in the house, I’ve regressed to being a mere beginner around here) to be informed that’s how it will be for at least the first week.

So, not only do I have to access all my e-mail via the web until later in the week when my new e-mail address can be created, (which is a pest, because I don’t keep a web-based address book – it’s a pest because I did not understand why we had to change ISP altogether when we both already had addresses with the same ISP, it’s also a pest because She who has set all this up assumed I’d be perfectly happy to access my e-mail from the web at all times “It’s not a problem for me.” so she didn’t bother to organise the capacity for other addresses. I thought we’d had all the discussion about all of this prior to getting here!!!) I can’t be sure I’m going to get any access reliably.

Great.

Then, Blogland goes all different on me…. it’s too much in one day.

Perhaps I’ll revert to re-setting all my default settings in real life. After all, I’ve only got a whole new city to learn about, find my way about, new people to make friends with, a whole way of life to get sorted.

I was just enjoying some kind of stability, somewhere!!! Even if “only” virtual.

comments... goodness me, how did that happen?

I think Jenray or Usksider gets the honour! Or maybe Sminchin.

I am well and truly on the way to being restored!!

I saw lots and lots of friends yesterday and we had an excellent time!

Even if half of them arrived way too early, before all the preparations were finished. Hardly anyone knew anyone else, but it all went with a swing. I was on my best behaviour and socialised beautifully and now I’m all partied out, thought I’d had enough of the human race, then…..

Decent internet access has arrived and blogging is going to be so much quicker and easier.

Oh happy and joyous day!!!

That’s it, enough now.

I never want to see any painting and decorating equipment or housecleaning stuff.

Ever again.

No, not ever.

I want tomorrow to be over with.

I want normality to return.

I want to be able to find my way around without having to consult an A –Z at every other street corner.

I want all my friends to be here, not lots of miles away. (It’s not just the ones I’ve recently left behind – it’s the ones I left behind the time before and the time before that…)

I want….

Too much probably!

Here we are at Nine of the Clock in the evening, and instead of being my usually reasonably lively self at this time of night, with at least another two hours if not more to go before even contemplating sleep, I’m yawning my head off, still feeling all-over achy (muscles complaining at being overworked from yesterday and not a lurgy, methinks) and wondering if I should really go to bed instead of blogging!

I didn’t get up until 10 this morning, and have had two naps, one late morning and one late afternoon.

The furthest I got was the supermarket a ten minute walk away for several delightful day-off items (Coffee Iced Madeira Cake and Diet Coke being chief amongst them.) and the most energetic thing I’ve done since is read a book and that was in small chunks rather than my usual voracious reading style.

Well, delightful as it would be to linger here, I’m not going to be good company, I can tell, so “Good-night” and hope to be better company soon.

I’ve spent an entire day cleaning and really enjoyed myself. It’s the kind of cleaning I like and do best, the tackling all the grimy, neglected places and really going for it. It’s a combination of guests over the weekend, and the fact it’s really needed doing that drove me to it.

I have a love/hate relationship with housework. The whole thing can trigger off some very awful memories of different stages of my life, and in certain frames of mind, I’m best not doing anything if I can avoid it. I’d also hate to have housework as my main activity. That said, I enjoy making grimy things clean, and creating sense out of chaos.

But, on a day like today, when there’s a clear task, and no other commitments, it was most enjoyable.

I’m also going to have a long, relaxing day tomorrow… no need to get up until I wake up, and no need to stay awake when I do wake up, unless I want to. I shall poddle down to the supermarket, and purchase some day off treats, and then curl up in a corner and read for the rest of the day.

Or I might phone a few friends, and re-establish contact with the world! I’ve e-mailed quite a few in the last couple of days.

Or I might go to the cinema.

Or I might carry on exploring the city centre. I do need to drop a few forms off!

Doing a bit more blogging will have to wait until next week, though! Improved Internet access is coming this way then. Hooray!!

Now, you have to understand something fundamentally important here.

Normally, the iron and I are not even close acquaintances. I have been known to use one, for special occasions (emergency drying of the knickers, rescuing work clothes when I’ve forgotten to get them out of the machine in time to prevent creases… the occasional Event!) but not on any regular basis.

Until today… from now on, ironing is going to turn into a regular event in my life. I did two hours worth, and though I say it myself, it all looked pretty good. Crisp, pristine white linen, all without a crease, and looking glorious! Past training will out, and I’d not forgotten a thing.

I’m quite, quite exhausted…. especially as I decided to do some quite different work as a change from packing/unpacking and general domestication, and found myself mentally wandering where I’d resolved not to go. (A few “What if’s I thought I’d discarded.)

Oh well, tomorrow is another day!

Some of my equilibrium is restored… Moving rooms really has done the trick, as I’ve unpacked twice as much a day and a half as I had in the previous week.

But, what has also helped has been beginning to get out of the house a bit more. What with one thing and another, I’ve been confined to home for weeks now, and I know this is not good for me!! Mind you, I can’t yet call here “home” but walking back this afternoon, I did feel a sense of this is beginning to be “my” patch.

It will also be good to get my computer into my own room… at the moment, I’m in the spare room where the empty boxes are being dumped prior to flattening, I’m sat in one of those plastic stacking chairs, (grey) with my legs propped on the tower, the keyboard on my lap, and the monitor on a stool. Oh, and using the mouse as little as possible. It’s not at all elegant! And it caused much hilarity yesterday! But it’s where the phone access is, until we get the better access sorted!

But I can see an end in sight with the unpacking… and looking forwards is just happening a bit more than looking backwards now. Which has been a great relief!

Only one bit! I’m working at getting all my stuff moved again… Luckily, I’d not really unpacked a lot!!

But, for lots of reasons, the room I’d originally chosen and really wanted actually wasn’t working for me at all. Some of the reasons are really silly ones, and I’m ashamed of myself for making such an issue (if only to me!) about them.

The real reasons, though, are much more important, and necessary to my emotional and mental well-being.

The first reason, and the one I’m majoring on to other people, is I’d completely forgotten I can’t live in such a dark room. I’ve tried several configurations, and concluded the natural light is never going to be enough.

The second, known only to me, Blogland and a few trusted friends, is that I won’t have anyone using the room immediately next to me, and at the moment, I’ve got the same person using the rooms on both internal adjoining walls, and crashing about in both rooms. Now, I know there’s still a lot of unpacking to do, and that some of the crashing about will settle – but not all of it. Past experience tells me that.

I’ve felt my mood going down and down all week, and only going up when I moved to other rooms in the flat. I was going into the room I’d been in feeling trapped and hemmed in, and not wanting to be there.

So – sense prevailed, and I’ve moved!!

For the first time in ages and ages, I’ve got the luxury of my own company for a whole day!! No interruptions, (other than the phone, which I may well ignore) no-one else to consider and nothing vital to do… I was on my own for most of yesterday, but for the time being, my computer’s not in my own room, and I was feeling very inhibited writing with other people kicking around the place.

This is an odd kind of limbo time. A definite sitting on the fence time, not knowing which side I’m going to get off.

I ought to be thinking about so many different things – finding paid work, finding things to get involved in, making contacts, putting all my books and music on shelves, getting my act together for the week away at the beginning of August (need to find a toy tortoise and eat more Pringles).

Then, there’s the major activity of trying to avoid other people’s expectations. Of which there are plenty. None of which I will be able to meet because I do not fit any stereotype – especially the one most easily assigned to me. They will soon learn that, though.

There’s the interesting concept that having got what I’ve been wanting for so long, somewhere along the line what I’ve been wanting has changed. Not dramatically so – the essence of it most definitely has not, but how I go about it definitely has. It’s enough to cause me consternation.

Ah well, the washing machine is about to stop, and as I wish to avoid doing any ironing, I’d better go and release my darks wash from its bondage.